Feelings of being alone-fearful-angry-feelings of worthlessness- hopelessness-restlessness, irritability, or feeling on edge-feelings of overwhelming anxiety and fear.
Over the last 5 or 6 months, I've been battling the worst depression I've ever had. Only now have I really decided to share this.
Over the last several months, making a phone call, reading or writing emails, getting out of bed was ALL so difficulty. Sitting and staring out the window consumed my days, I'm not even sure what I was staring at.
I tried to get to some of the every day chores, laundry, dishes, emails, phone calls, but I have to admit that did not always happen.
For me one of the worst things about depression, is knowing your depressed-knowing what to do to help yourself, but, and its a BIG BUT-Not to be confused with a BIG BUTT! I just could not do it, its just to much effort...
There are so many things that got left undone when this hit me. Which only added to the depression and the guilt.
So how do I go to all of these people that were counting on me, and tell them what? I'm sorry I did not get to you, I let you down- I was depressed?
There are a lot of people out there, who just do not understand depression, and living with depression. For me I do not like telling others I'm depressed-because of the fear of what they may think.
Whats your thoughts?
What do you do when your depressed?
Do you suffer with depression all of the time?
Do you tell others when your depressed?
Carol Rains
1 comment:
Whats your thoughts?
What do you do when your depressed?
Do you suffer with depression all of the time?
Do you tell others when your depressed?
I have RSD (CRPS1) in both legs and CRPS2 in both shoulders, arms and hands. RSD, as you have probably found is notorious for sending me on a depression binge. I take St. John's Wart, under the approval of my doctor regularly. Two caps three times a day. I DO tell people. . . that's my safety harness. Depresion can be dangerous, people need to know so that they can prepare to help if help is needed.
I learned a long time ago that I do not want to die, I want the pain to die. Unfortunately me and the pain are one in the same. . .different aspect of self, but still. I must TREAT the pain, and in so doing treat myself.
Depression for me is usually at it's worst after a severe near ER visit type of flare or a flare that lasts a long time and starts up new symptoms.
I am in therapy with a counselor, and that helps a lot. Recognizing that depression is a symptom of RSD and not the opposite way around helps, as well.
When I'm depressed I cry A LOT. I also feel incredibly hopeless - and I hurt emotionally. What I do for the depression is what I've said above. I try to keep myself active - I work out, take vitamins, and try to be as much a part of life as I possibly can. This disease is very isolating.
The first thing the doctor who diagnosed me said to me is: This is the toughest pain disease you can possibly be diagnosed with, get into an online or a face to face support group and get support. You will need it.
He was absolutely right.
Beth.
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