Today is OK

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Well its Groundhogs day, and looks like we were suppose to have 6 more weeks of winter. I can not wait! I love spring and summer, for so many reasons. I love the flowers that grow, a warm sunny day, working in the yard-pulling weeds-planting-BBQ-family and friends! From the first frost in the fall to the last frost in the spring I look forward to warmer days. With warmer days and nights for me comes fewer pain flare ups, this is always a plus. The cold fall days and winter nights make for long painful days. The depression seems to be hanging over me like a thick London fog, at times leaving me feeling like there is never going to be another day, and sometimes wishing this was true. If living with this monster was not enough of a curse, then you have life to deal with! You know like the kids, a spouse, pets, bills, traffic, family, house work, your boss, - the kids, a spouse, pets, bills, traffic, family, house work, your boss, its like it never ends!!!

Today were visiting with two of our grandchildren Paige is 8, and Kaiden is 5, they are from Fort Collins CO. I can't believe how much they've grown! They will be here a few more days, seeing them and watching them makes me so happy!

I'm enjoying the facebook group page I started in December 2009, this morning I saw the group has grown to 200 members! I enjoy researching chronic pain stories, and treatments and then sharing them with the group. I enjoy reading how others deal with their day to day lives.

For me having my husband John with me or at least near me, during a flare or really any time is such a comfort, as a person who lives with daily pain, I am so thankful for John, and my children who are always there for me. I know life at times can be extremely difficult for John, when I'm not feeling well he tries so hard to take care of all my needs. All though like any couple there are those days when I would like to stuff him in a closet or something!!! But I still love him!

Marriage Issues Related To Chronic Pain

Below is the article I wanted to share, after living with RSD/CRPS now for almost 11 years, my husband John and I have had our share of problems, and have we've even discussed divorce a few times. Life with RSD is not easy for us with it, but I think we do need to try and remember to be more patient with those we love. I hope you enjoy this, for more information see their web site http://www.families-and-chronic-pain.com/index.html

Marriage issues are one of the most important issues for a couple dealing with chronic pain. Couples are together more and ‘my time’ and ‘my space’ is disrupted. You are used to things as they were and everything has changed.
The love is there, but the space is gone. You ultimately spend more time together now and with the chronic pain. It makes a significant change in the relationship that wasn’t there before.

Marriage issues arise in many different ways. I know every relationship is different but there are some factors that need to be considered.

Due to the chronic pain, the effect on your relationship will be due, to the intensity and frequency of the pain as well as the severity of the disability. For someone with the occasional migraine headache, the impact is minimal.

Those that sustain a severe injury and are in constant pain, this is different. Things are very different. They are unable to work, they feel like they have let their family down and the pain is a constant reminder. This can cause a significant change in your lifestyle.

Remember that, no two couples will cope with the same situation in the same way. Some will find it more than they can handle and question whether, they will be able to cope with the stress this will bring on them and the family. Others will take it all in stride and adjust to the changes with ease. It just depends on the couple.

Communication in marriage is so important for it’s survival. Without it , the silent treatment will occur and very little can be accomplished. An unhappy marriage is always fixable. You can get couples therapy, visiting with your clergy, individual therapy, bend a friends ear or just sit down and have a good cry.

Having a church family to depend on, also helps. Friends in a church family could be the ones that will help you the most. They are good listeners and will do anything to help. They will hold you when you cry and rejoice with you in times of victory.
TALK, TALK, TALK
Never, ever let communication be used as a weapon. Silence is not golden in this situation, unless divorce is the outlet you want to follow.

No one really has the right answers to marriage problems but, chronic pain will surely test the strength of a marriage.

Today I feel like

Image by janusz l via Flickr

Not feeling so good today, so just hanging out in bed, and watching FOX NEWS...

Also try to get to a long list of emails, and updates... I hope you have a chance to read the story I posted earlier. Here is a quote from one of the young ladies
"Different things work for different people," Jill said. "Be open to the possibilities." I know for myself as an adult dealing with the daily pains of CRPS/RSD daily is trying at best for me! these young ladies show that friends, and team work go along way!

Wishing you all pain free days & nights

Carol